Random, Rambling Thoughts of an INFJ (#1)

Sometimes you meet someone, and you wonder if that person is going to play a significant role in your life, or at least, I wonder that sometimes. I wonder if this one conversation I have with a stranger has the potential of changing the trajectory of my life. In other peoples' lives, simple conversations did change everything for them, but they probably didn't realize the importance until much later in their lives.

Sometimes I'm hoping so desperately for God to give me a sign or a nudge or some indication I'm right where I'm suppose to be that I give more meaning to these interactions than they really deserve (I don't really buy into deep, deep meaning in most things. I'm not instantly going to think, "Oh! I found an art teacher. That means God wants me to pursue art fulltime and go to art school.").  I also believe God puts people in your life for certain reasons, but people are deeply flawed and even the most well-meaning individuals can put real roadblocks in your path. I have trouble trusting other peoples' advice for my life because I don't feel like they know me well enough to give something more than the generic advice.

Yet, I know God does use people as signposts, and I don't want to be so busy waiting for some direct message straight from God (which probably isn't going to come) that I miss the message He sends through a flawed but loving individual. If the person says something I don't like (but the advice/words are still from God), I don't want to just dismiss it as the person's personal opinion because people are flawed and they don't understand me and blah, blah, blah. What happens if you don't pay enough attention to something that was supposed to be very, very important? Or do you believe if something is suppose to happen, it happens? I guess some of this comes down to whether you believe in free-choice or if all of this is inevitable.

Welcome to my brain. This is the place where my thoughts go in complete circles. ALL the time.

Yesterday, I had one of those moments when I wondered if a conversation with a complete stranger was truly God-sent (with the clear message of 'Chill out.'). I went to another Christmas concert at a church (Big band/Jazz. Four trombones, four trumpets, four French horns, a tuba, piano, bass, and drums = Pretty awesome), and afterwards they had a reception which I went to briefly. Ended up sitting across from a lady who works as a band teacher. She wanted to know if I was musically inclined, and I said I have dabbled in learning a few instruments. She ended up telling me that she didn't go back to school until she was twenty-four (I'm not currently in college, but that's a whole different story), but by that time, she knew exactly what she wanted to do.

This stranger ended up giving me the encouragement I hoped to receive from other people in my life of high important who instead have mostly misunderstood my choices or not tried to help in anyway, not even in prayer (which is something I'm realizing I desperately, desperately need). She said she'd pray that I would know the way God would have me go, and maybe those are just words, but for a stranger to say them to me when our conversation hadn't been too deep and revealing meant a lot to me. In a way, with our brief conversation, it seemed like she understood a lot of my inner thoughts that I didn't vocalize when I said I was working and 'in-between things'. For someone to be understanding - it really means a lot, and you don't always realize that.